Sometimes, two types can look very similar to one another. Although there are various books that help distinguish between the two, much of the time they either rely on stereotypes or treat as mutually exclusive traits which can easily exist in the same person. While no misidentification guide can apply to everyone or every situation, my hope is to provide enough information to help people distinguish which is the closer fit.
Ones and Twos
Ones and twos can seem very similar to one another. Both can be very idealistic, both tend to feel they know what's best for others, and both tend to need to feel needed. There are some very important differences between the two, however. Ones want to be correct, whereas twos want to be loved. A one will be more inclined to say something critical and correcting for the other's "own good" whereas a two is more concerned with being sensitive to the person's feelings so that they may be valued by them. Ones will see themselves as logical, operating from principle, even when they don't come across that way to others. Twos are less concerned with being logical, and more concerned with appearing as loving. Twos want to serve others and be validated by them, whereas ones want to convert others and persuade them to what ones consider to be the objectively right way to be.
Ones and Threes
Ones and threes can look similar, since they both tend to be hard-working, perfectionistic and prone to anxiety. The biggest difference between ones and threes is in terms of rigidity. In social situations, a one will have a clear idea of the proper way to behave, and will be very concerned with having the social situation follow certain rules and structures. Threes, even if they consider something socially inappropriate, are less inclined to draw attention to it, preferring to keep things operating smoothly. Ones are free giving criticism. While threes may be critical, especially if their professions expect it, they tend to try to "soften the blow" with social niceties, and are generally less comfortable saying anything that might alienate others. Both have high standards, but ones tend to have high standards because they believe they alone know the "right" way to be, whereas threes high standards tend to stem more from a desire to seem high class and refined. Both tend to have perfectionistic anxiety, but ones are perfectionistic because of wanting to live up to the demands of their superegos, whereas threes are perfectionistic for fear of looking like a failure or making a faux pas.
Ones and Fours
ones and Fours are similar in that one is the security point of four, and four is the stress point of one. Both can be very critical, and both are frustration types. There are a couple of key differences, however. For ones, their periods of being less productive and falling into self-pity are the exception and not the norm. They tend to see such tendencies as lacking in self-control, so that when they're back "up" they tend to distance themselves from the memory of their rough patch. For fours, they not only have a more long-standing pattern of self-pity, self-indulgence and self-absorption, but they wrap their identity around it. They are more inclined to describe their low-productivity and lengthy time sorting through their emotions as "just how they are"--something a one would never say. Also, ones tend to be forceful in telling others what they believe is the right way to be, falling into judgmental preaching. While fours can do this occasionally, they are less dogmatic, less inclined to see things in black-and-white terms, and more inclined to empathize.
Ones and Fives
Ones and Fives are both similar in that they're oriented towards rationality, see themselves as objective, and tend to express strong opinions. They differ considerably in motivation, however. Ones tend to be moralistic, believe strongly in social norms and want to show people the "right" way to be. Fives are more interested in undermining others beliefs whether they actually hold their stated position or not, being more interested in being subversive than being correct. They tend to not be concerned about social norms and are less inclined to want to "save the world." Ones are detached because they want to be balanced and rational, whereas fives are detached because they fear being intruded upon or overwhelmed.
Ones and Sixes
Ones and sixes look similar because they're both dutiful types, both take their responsibilities seriously, are prone to anxiety and tend to be drawn to politics. The difference comes in the confidence of their views. Ones take a position, but don't question their views, thinking or assumptions enough. Sixes question themselves too much, so that even when they boldly defend a view, they are never quite certain that what they think or perceive is correct, second-guessing their judgment constantly. They're also very different in their motivation for political involvement. Ones join groups, especially activist groups, because they see the group as a more advantageous vessel for promoting their views, becoming disillusioned when the group fails to adopt their agenda. Sixes join political groups to form allies against what they see as a dangerous "other" and as such are more inclined to adopt the tenets of the group, becoming threatened by too much internal dissent. Ones will tend to have a general compassion for humanity while being overly critical of particular individuals in their life. Sixes are loyal to the people they're close to while being suspicious of outsiders.
Ones and Sevens
Like with ones and fours, ones and sevens can resemble eachother. Ones go to seven when secure, whereas sevens go to one under stress. Again, you can distinguish between the two by looking at the overall life pattern. Sevens tend to be more uninhibited than ones, with a long standing pattern of indulgence and sensation seeking. Whatever their source of pleasure, they're oriented towards seeking it out. Ones, by contrast, tend to have a pattern of restraint, enjoying pleasures but always seeing it as an occasional indulgence which they must carefully monitor. Sevens value pleasure and enjoyment, whereas ones value moderation and correctness.
Ones and Eights
Both can seem similar in the forcefulness of their personality, tendency to be undeterred by obstacles, and the aggressiveness of their viewpoints. In general, eights tend to be a lot more comfortable with their anger, less inclined towards moderation, and less concerned with being morally correct. Their focus is on establishing dominance and protecting those that they see as being under their care. Ones tend to have a lot of guilt about their anger, trying to find moral and/or political battles as the focus of their rage. They value being self-controlled. Eights will be proud of their aggression as indicative of their toughness, while ones are ashamed of their anger, as indicative of a loss of self-control.
Ones and Nines
Ones and nines in general aren't terribly similar, but a one with a nine wing or a nine with a one wing can occasionally resemble one another. Neither one is comfortable with its anger, but with ones it comes out as judgment and criticality, whereas nines will try to be appear accepting of others and un-critical while letting the source of their anger fester or come out passive-aggressively. Nines also have difficulty in getting motivated, tending to fall into routine and an easy-going manner. Ones tend to be hard-working and perfectionistic, highly motivated, feeling guilty when they let themselves relax for too long. Nines like to mediate and create harmonious alliances, often being easily swayed by others viewpoints. Ones tend to be fervent in their beliefs, diligently trying to persuade others.
Twos and Threes
Twos and threes can look similar in that both seem oriented towards other people, and both seem to need a certain amount of external validation. The motivation tends to be different between the two. Twos primarily want to be loved and seen as good people, and are generally more in touch with their need for validation. Threes want others approval but tend to couch it more in terms of being appropriate and pragmatic. Contrary to what some enneagram literature says, I don't believe threes to always be self-promoting. As astute observers of people, healthier threes readily realize how counter-productive such constant self-promoting is, and can often show considerable interest in other people. However, twos tend to become overly involved, remembering every last detail about the other person, and trying to constantly make the relationship deeper than it is. Threes may express concern and interest in others but it usually has a "cocktail party conversation" element to it. Threes also tend to be more reserved than twos, uncomfortable with too much intimacy too quickly in a relationship.
Twos and Fours
Twos and Fours can look similar in that they're both feeling types, and both oriented towards romantic relationships, searching for the ideal love. Twos tend to seek love through martyrdom, being of service to others, whereas fours tend to seek love through showing their depth and individuality. Twos want to do everything they can for you to enter your world, whereas fours hold back, want you to notice them, and enter their world. Both can have a poor sense of boundaries, and can confuse their idealizing of others with the real person. Fours are considerably more in touch with their negativity, identifying strongly with feelings of depression, abandonment and self-doubt. They are prone to roller-coaster relationships, and love/hate relationships are not uncommon. Twos, by contrast, tend to deny their aggressive feelings, only expressing them when they go to 8 under stress, and usually in the vein of being unappreciated. Twos will seldom admit to more negative emotions, and tend to have an air of superiority about their goodness. Fours tend to devalue their own goodness, seeing goodness as only accessible through the introjecting of a loved one's better qualities.
Twos and Fives
Twos and fives are very unlikely to be confused. Twos want love and push for more connection, and will martyr themselves to get others' approval. Fives tend to want to protect their space from intrusion, and are afraid of being overwhelmed by others' needs. While fives, especially the sexual subtype, can sometimes disregard others' boundaries when their passions are ignited, they find self-sacrifice in the name of love to be extremely difficult, running hot and cold, seeking contact when they need it, but withdrawing into seclusion whenever they start to feel overwhelmed. Furthermore, twos tend to be more concerned with social graces whereas fives, even the social subtype, see social norms as little more than a foolish and perfunctory human invention. Twos tend to exhibit their positive emotions freely while denying feelings like cynicism and pessimism. Fives tend to be more restrained, but express cynicism and argumentativeness freely.
Twos and Sixes
Unlike twos and fives, twos and sixes are commonly confused. Both of them need the approval of others, and both tend to want assurances that the relationship is going well. There are some fundamental differences, however. Twos want very much to see themselves as good, as the helpers and caretakers of the world, often offering their support without questioning the motives of others. Sixes question both their own motivations and perceptions and the trustworthiness of others. Twos focus on positive feelings, whereas sixes have a lot of negativity, especially anxiety, pessimism and mistrust.
Twos and Sevens
Twos and sevens can seem similar in that both tend to be very vivacious, energetic personalities. Both can seem flirtatious, especially the sexual subtype, and enjoy the attentions of others. Sevens, in general, are more concerned with being the life of the party, are irreverent, and can be a bit abrasive with their humor if they think it will get a good laugh out of people. Sevens can enjoy playing the host/hostess by throwing parties at their home or generously sharing their wealth (if they have it) with their wide circle of friends. However, whereas twos are self-effacing, sevens most definitely are not. Twos tend to be less inclined towards a caustic sense of humor wanting to see themselves as "nice" people. Sevens tend to be more independent than two, seeing people as their audience, whereas twos want to make themselves invaluable and indispensible to others, so that others will care about and appreciate them.
Twos and Eights
This is another unlikely misidentification. In general, eights like to look tough on the outside, while inwardly having a sense of vulnerability. Twos like to project an outward facade of compassion and emotionality, while inwardly being tougher than they let on. Even when twos go to eight under stress and become more aggressive, their aggression centers around guilt trips about how unappreciated they are, rather than legitimate plays for dominance and authority. Think of the difference between a drill sergeant and a missionary.
Twos and Nines
Twos and nines can look similar in that both tend to merge with others, and both tend to be self-effacing in their own ways. Nines, in general, are disengaged, tending to be removed from their feelings, and often finding it hard to mobilize themselves into action. Twos, by contrast, want to stay in constant activity and service to others. Twos tend to aggressively pursue the other through flirtation, flattery, gifts and favors. Nines are more receptive and indecisive, tending to be pleasant and easy going but not necessarily assertive. Twos, like ones, believe they know what is best for others. Nines tend to have more of a "live and let live" attitude.
Threes and Fours
Threes and fours can seem similar due to their image orientation, sense of refinement and enjoyment of the finer things in life. Threes especially can seem like fours if the focus of their ambitions is the arts and/or they were raised in a family where an appreciation of the arts was an important part of high social standing. Despite the "ambitious lawyer/stockbroker" stereotype of threes in a lot of the literature, it's been my observation that many threes are found in the arts, and a lot of women that were raised by "stage moms/ballerina moms" are threes. One of the ways you can tell is by the social finesse of threes. Threes are much better at portraying an aura of confidence than fours are, tend to have an easier time making contacts and connections, and navigating the political landscape of their chosen professions. Fours struggle more with feelings of self-consciousness and being different. Also, threes have an easier time turning off their feelings and throwing themselves into work. Fours tend to need to fully process their feelings and don't bounce back quite as quickly as threes do. Also, the motivations are different. Fours key issues involve feeling different, defective and needing to "be themselves." Threes want external validation, feel the need to be perfect, but also struggle with feelings that they are fooling others into thinking they're better than they are. While threes may show subtle emotional reactions, they generally find it easier to maintain a facade and feign being okay, whereas fours tend to be slightly more dramatic, with strong emotional reactions coming across more easily in non-verbal cues. Finally, while both are identified with their self-image, fours are identified with a negative self-image, whereas threes have cultivated a positive self-image that they are constantly struggling to live up to.
Threes and Fives
Similar to the distinction between threes and fours, this mistype is most common when someone was raised in a household where being well-educated and well-read was considered an important part of good breeding. Threes that were raised in a household where high intellectual achievement was expected may mistype themselves as five due to the intellectual stereotype of fives in the literature. In general, threes tend to be very outgoing, cordial and skilled in the social niceties. Fives tend to be more private, less interested in the social niceties, and not finding much use for the protocols or obligatory activities of their chosen profession. Also, threes can adapt themselves to the interests of the person they're talking to, whereas fives tend to control the conversation more, wanting mostly to talk about whatever their area of expertise is. Threes are pragmatists, and generally are good at knowing how to handle the less glamorous, more practical aspects of their profession in order to reach their goals. Fives, by contrast, tend to consider red tape or unpleasant tasks an intrusion that derails them from what they really want to do. Threes like to stay busy constantly, whereas fives tend to feel overwhelmed easily.
Threes and Sixes
Threes and sixes can look similar because three is the stress point of six and six is the security point of three. Threes are especially prone to be mistyped as sixes, since the literature describes threes as self-promoting and self interested, and sixes as being more dutiful and cooperative. The big difference is in the confidence in one's judgment. Threes are less prone to second-guess themselves and tend to feel more confident in their ability to handle difficulties,should they arise. Both can be anxious, and both can be concerned about what others think. Threes aren't generally looking for something to believe in, nor do they tend to have the ambivalent relationship to authority that sixes have. Whereas threes want the recognition of important people in their field as validation of their talent, sixes tend to look to authority to give them a sense of security and stability.
Threes and Sevens
Threes and sevens can look similar in many ways. Both are assertive types. Both tend to have a good sense of how to portray themselves to get what they want, and both have a natural knack for seeming confident and impressive. In general, sevens are more charlatans--bullshit artists that can quickly give the impression of skill and expertise. Threes can also be deceptive, but their deception takes on the form of confusing their polite responses with their actual feelings. The three's deceit is more self-deception for the sake of their image whereas in the seven it's more other-deception for the sake of having fun and getting away with something. Both tend to have refined tastes and enjoy the finer things of life, but sevens are more gluttonous, taking their favorite things to the point of excess, whereas threes tend to be more moderate, lest their indulgences interfere with their goals.
Threes and Eights
Threes and eights can look similar because they're both achievement-oriented assertive types. In general, the self-assertion is much bolder and at the forefront with eights than it is with threes, who try to conceal their ambitions behind courteousness and sociability. Threes are less inclined to express anger directly than eights are. This isn't to say that threes aren't ever angry or impatient or frustrated--as a classic "type A" personality they most certainly can be--but it takes a lot more for them to break out of character and express it with the openness and intensity that eights possess. Also, eights tend to thrive on leadership, whereas leadership is a means to an end with threes.
Threes and Nines
These two are pretty tough to confuse. Threes tend to be ambitious, active and achievement-oriented, whereas nines tend to be low-key, routine-bound and disengaged. When a three goes to nine under stress, they can experience a decrease in productivity that can seem nine-ish, but looking at the overall pattern in one's life can clarify this. Both can seem harmonious and seem to adapt to the people they're around, but for a three they tend to be "on stage" coming out of roles as the different situations require, but with an underlying sharpness of focus. Nines tend to merge with the people they're with, having their identity more caught up with the other person than with their own self-image.
Fours and Fives
Fours and fives can look similar because of both being withdrawn types that see themselves as different. Also, a four that has an intellectual bent may see themselves as fives due to the descriptions in the literature, just as an artistic five may see themselves as fours. The biggest difference is in emotional expression. Fours emotional reactions tend to be strong, crying easily, feeling grief intensely. Fours tend to be more emotionally reactive, becoming dramatic or indirectly letting their hurt be known when they feel rejected or abandoned. Fives tend to feel intimidated and threatened by such emotional expression, feeling highly protective of their boundaries. Fours identify more strongly with their melancholy whereas fives identify more strongly with their nihilism. Both can seem moody and withdraw inexplicably from others, but fours withdraw so that they can sort through the barrage of emotions they experience, whereas fives withdraw because of feeling overwhelmed and their desire for non-engagement.
Fours and Sixes
Fours and sixes can seem similar because both are emotional, self-doubting and insecure. There are some fundamental differences. Fours tend to doubt themselves, but look outside themselves for ideal love, whereas sixes doubt themselves and while they look outside themselves for authority, they also tend to mistrust the good intentions of their chosen authority. Also, fours sense of identity revolves around their being different, sensitive and troubled whereas for sixes, their identities revolve more around being loyal and reliable, as well as the standards of their community. Although social fours can be drawn to counter-culture groups, they tend to feel their difference from that group acutely, often experiencing a conflict between their desire to belong and their desire to maintain their individuality. Sixes have an easier time forming bonds within the group, ingratiating themselves more quickly. Both fours and sixes may feel like outcasts, but for fours this is both a source of anguish and a source of pride, whereas it's less tolerable for sixes. Also, while sixes may identify with the underdog, they also can become persecutory themselves by what they perceive as a threat. Fours are unlikely to persecute outsiders to help their social standing. Both can be idealistic, but sixes are more likely to see things in terms of "us versus them" whereas fours tend to find that such partisan stances compromise their individuality too much. Finally, sixes tend to feel anxious in their own mind, whereas fours tend to retreat into fantasy and imagination.
Fours and Sevens
Fours and sevens can look similar in terms of their tendency towards indulgence and a certain volatile emotionality. This is especially true with the 4w3 and the sx 7w6. Both are moody, both are drawn to intense experiences, both can be prone to romanticizing others. Some enneagram theorists distinguish the two, saying sevens are more extroverted whereas fours are more introverted. While extroversion is more common among sevens and introversion is more common among fours, either type can be an introvert or extrovert based on life situations and current emotional climate. In general, sevens tend to be more confident as well as more distraction-seeking. Fours tend to have a much higher degree of shame, and tend to be troubled with feelings of inhibition and self-loathing. Sevens main focus is on indulging in whatever their source of pleasure is to the point of excess. This excess can be intense emotions, introspection, intellectualism or more "traditional" sources of hedonism. However, sevens seldom have problems with envy. Fours, by contrast, struggle deeply with envy, comparing themselves to others and constantly coming up short.
Fours and Eights
Fours and eights can seem similar, especially if the four is the sexual subtype, which can be more aggressive and competitive. In general, fours have a lot of vulnerability and sensitivity. Eights tend to take more of a tough persona. Eights are more direct, considering aggression part of being "strong" and a necessary defense mechanism. Fours aggression tends to get more mixed with feelings of despair, self-loathing and abandonment fears.
Fours and Nines
Fours and nines are similar in terms of both being withdrawn types. Both are prone to fantasizing. In general, nines are self-effacing, try to maintain a positive attitude, and go along with the wishes and expectations of others in an effort to keep everything harmonious. Fours are more identified with their negativity and are focused on being different and authentic, unlikely to sublimate their own feelings, opinions and desires in an effort to please other people. Nines are unassuming and easy-going, fours want to be distinctive and recognized for their refinement and sensitivity.
Fives and Sixes
Fives and sixes can both be intellectuals. Fives can look to logic and reason as a system to help make them better prepared and informed to deal with the world. Due to their detachment, fives are naturally drawn to the life of the mind. Sixes look to reason as an authority and can be overzealous in their faith in the certainty of reason. For this reason, the two types can seem similar. In general, fives are more of a "schizoid" personality type, opting for non-involvement. Sixes by contrast have more of a "paranoid" personality type. Fives are drawn to intellectualism to give them a source of knowledge, sixes are drawn to intellectualism to give them certainty that their thought processes are correct. Fives tend to be more independent, but also have greater difficulty navigating the social realm. Sixes are naturally affiliative, wanting reassurance and being concerned with what others think. Both can be pessimistic and complaining, but sixes are classic "help seeking refusers," wanting the support of others but also not trusting their motives. Fives are more of your survivalist type, wanting to maintain their autonomy and privacy as much as possible.
Fives and Sevens
Fives and sevens tend to be pretty different. Sevens are typically outgoing, expansive and assertive. Fives are private, reserved and detached. However, five is the security point of seven and seven is the stress point of five. In general, sevens have more of an overall pattern of being pleasure seeking, but also are more of generalists. When they move to five, they tend to experience an increase in focus and concentration, but still see their life punctuated by the pursuit of their pleasures. Fives may go to seven under stress, but this is usually in stark contrast to their otherwise focused and minimizing style. Sevens tend to be quite generous if they're able to, whereas fives can be downright stingy with their time, money and energy.
Fives and Eights
Fives and eights are also strikingly different from one another. Fives go to eight when secure and eights go to five under stress, so they can both show some of the traits of the other. However, by and large, the distinctions between the two are pretty obvious. Fives tend to see themselves as small and powerless, and therefore are rather afraid of direct confrontation. Eights tend to be quite comfortable being aggressive, and are more direct than most of the people around them. They tend to prefer the direct approach. If you've done something that bothers them, you'll know exactly what it is and why. Fives subvert and eights confront. Fives have difficulty mobilizing themselves, staying constantly in preparation mode. Eights are ambitious, asserting themselves and going after their goals in a very passionate and unequivocal manner.
Fives and Nines
Fives and nines can seem similar due to the fact that they're both withdrawn types, and neither likes conflict. However, nines tend to try to stay in positive thoughts, "going with the flow," and leaning towards optimism. Fives tend to be negative and cynical, seeing themselves as undermining the beliefs of others. Fives hold themselves aloof, not wanting others to demand too much of them. Nines are agreeable, mediating and accommodating. Both types can have a hard time getting motivated, but fives have trouble because they don't feel prepared to deal with the world, whereas nines don't want any disruption to their routine, wanting to preserve their peace of mind above all else. Fives feel disconnected, nines lose their identity through merging with others. Fives are outside observers to their experiences, watching the details of what's happening while never quite feeling like a participant. Nines dissociate from their experiences, getting lost in fantasies or "spacing out."
Sixes and Sevens
Sixes and sevens can seem similar in that they're both head types, especially in the case of 6w7 and 7w6. This can be clarified by looking at the attitude towards authority. Sixes tend to have highly charged attitudes towards authority, either being very rebellious towards authority or vying for an authority figure's protection, approval and support. In most cases, the six will flip-flop between the two, both looking for a trustworthy authority and becoming suspicious and rebellious. By contrast, sevens tend to neither be concerned with authorities nor see themselves as authority. In general, sevens are disinterested in authority issues and prefer an attitude of equality and camaraderie.
Sixes and eights
Sixes and eights can look similar when a six is showing strong counterphobic traits. The six's tendency to overcompensate for his fears can resemble the aggressiveness and risk-taking of eight. Also, both sixes and eights have very pronounced issues with trust. You can tell the difference by looking at the underlying motivation. For sixes, even when counterphobic, there is an underlying anxiety that drives everything they do. While any type can have anxiety, in six the anxiety is different in that it is a driving force that never wanes, regardless of what life situation the six happens to be in. The aggressiveness, therefore, is in response to this constant, driving anxiety. Eights' driving emotion isn't anxiety but anger. There's less of a feeling of overcompensation.
Sixes and nines
Sixes and nines can seem similar since six is the stress point of nine, and nine is the security point of six. In general, sixes' relationships to others are more complicated and ambivalent, full of contradictions with a lot of push/pull as they struggle with their desire to be secure and their desire to be independent. Nines are more directly accommodating, and while they may have some hidden resentments due to unexpressed frustrations, don't tend to present the contradictory picture or run hot and cold the way sixes do. Both types can be passive-aggressive but in different ways. For nines, passive-aggressiveness is a way out of something they don't want to do. They can become forgetful and procrastinating of obligations they don't want to fulfill. Sixes passive-aggressiveness has a more hostile flair to it, manifesting in caustic remarks and, occasionally, gossip. When upset, sixes tend not to be very good at hiding their negative feelings. Nines tend to present a more pleasant, diplomatic, if uninvolved face to the world.
Sevens and Eights
Sevens and eights can seem similar in that they're both assertive types, both tend to be upfront about what they think, are unafraid of confrontation, and have an irreverent sense of humor. However, eights focus tends to be on control. Sevens by contrast love their freedom and, as such, don't want to deny freedom to anyone else. Eights readily see themselves as an authority, sevens see themselves as egalitarian. Eights have great access to their anger and are generally cognizant of their negative emotions. Sevens have a harder time accessing their negative feelings, tending to gravitate towards positive feelings. Both sevens and eights can become highly self-destructive when unhealthy, tending to become angry or escape into alcoholism, drug abuse and high risk ventures. However, eights become self-destructive because they feel powerless, whereas sevens self-destruct as a way of avoiding reflecting on painful feelings at all costs.
Sevens and nines
Sevens and nines can seem similar because of their optimism and easy going demeanor, but otherwise these two are very easy to tell apart. Sevens are assertive, nines are withdrawn. Sevens tend to seek out as much stimulation as they can, nines become anxious when there is too much stimulation. Sevens see others as aiding in their hedonism, whereas nines get swept along by the wishes and expectations of others.
Eights and nines
In most cases, these two don't seem too similar, except in the case of an eight with a nine wing and a nine with an eight wing. As with seven and nine, the difference is between a withdrawn type and an assertive type. In general, eights are oriented towards control, protecting those in their care, managing resources and being above all strong. Eights enjoy confrontations and battles just for the "rush" of winning and intense feeling. Nines will become confrontational if they really feel pushed, but generally find confrontation to be very unsettling, wanting above all else to maintain their peace of mind. Eights want intensity, nines want routine. Eights are very aware of and comfortable with their anger, nines tend to deny their anger until it explodes.